Eat the Best Food Ever

It appears in your freezer, or your shopping cart, at the bottom, in  the back,  (maybe) shamefully sitting among the legitimate food that belongs there because it’s DELICIOUS, ALWAYS IN SEASON, and EASY AS FUCK TO PREPARE. It’s about as cheap as meat comes and super-tasty. Never eat this in a restaurant or as a guest or host. This is strictly Home Food.

Preheat oven to 275F

Ingredients:

chuck roast, of any size

salt and pepper, and any other herbs/seasonings you like with beef, mixed with flour

oil

red wine

beef stock

1 onion, quartered, and some celery if you have it

any roasting vegetables, peeled as needed, cut into bite-sized pieces (the primary ones are carrots and potatoes, but rutabagas, parsnips, celery root, sweet potatoes, yams, mushrooms, and turnips are all good too)

Wondra Sauce Flour (or regular flour, see instructions)

Heat up some oil in an enamel-coated Dutch Oven, or something similar. Rinse and pat dry the chuck roast. Dredge in flour mixture.  Time to brown the meat. Don’t skip this step, because it creates a thing called the Maillard Reaction, where the browning seals the meat and slightly caramelizes. Then add some beef stock or wine, a cup or two, and deglaze the pan, being careful to not knock the crust off of the meat. You should have about an inch of liquid. Drop in the quartered onion, and celery if you have it.  Cover tightly, and place in the oven. Bake for several hours (let’s say 5, but it could be 4 or 6), adding liquid (wine or stock—you can use all stock, but don’t use all wine) if it’s nearly all gone. Once that chuck is falling-apart tender, take it out of the braising liquid (that’s what you were doing) put on a plate, and wrap tightly with foil. Put your roasting vegetables in the pan, adding more liquid if there’s less than an inch left. Roast the vegetables until the toughest one is fork-tender. Remove vegetables from pot with a slotted spoon. Discard celery and remains of the onion, if any exist. Add Wondra flour. If you don’t have any, put regular flour in a small jar and add very cold water. Beat it with a fork, and then shakeitshakeitshakeitshakeit until it’s a lump-free slurry. In either case, keep beating that gravy with a balloon whip. Do not wander off! Continue to add flour until the gravy is the right thickness (with each addition, give the flour a couple of minutes to absorb) and then check seasonings. Add fresh ground pepper and salt until it tastes like gravy. If you have any demiglace (or lazy chef demiglace, Kitchen Bouquet), whisk in a little. Serve the chuck, vegetables, and gravy family-style.

We all buy these. Sometimes, at great expense (see Truffle Salt.) This is all easy as fuck to make at home. Got some salt? A flavor you want to mix with salt? A way to dry it all out? Ok, you are in business. Do this:

Take your (peeled) garlic, your (greenest parts) celery or fennel or super-fine chopped herb like rosemary or dill and pulverize it into nothingness in your food processor. Then mix in a bowl with kosher salt, blending with your hands or a spoon until it looks like it is about half salt and about half herbs. It’ll be chunky-wet and unmistakeably green.

Spread out 1/4″ thick onto trays in your dehydrator or cookie sheets on the lowest heat (160F) in the oven until dry, 4-8 hours. Break up with hands every 2 hours. Grind again in food processor after dry if chunks are too big. You are welcome.

From chef Robin Leventhal, Wine Country Culinary Institute and CraveFood.com

2 tablespoons grapeseed or canola oil

1/2 cup shallots, minced

2 teaspoons salt

1 tablespoon fresh ginger, grated

2 cups water

2 cups coconut milk

2 cups dried red lentils, rinsed, sorted and soaked for 15 minutes in water (Leventhal uses Sunrise red lentils from PNW Co-op)

1 cup chopped tomatillos

2 tablespoons chopped cilantro, plus sprigs for garnish

2 slivers Serrano chili, plus garnish

1 teaspoon lime zest

1/8 cup lime juice

Scallions, slivered for garnish

Cucumber, slivered for garnish

In a 2-quart saucepan on medium heat, saute oil, shallots and salt until fragrant. Add ginger and toast until fragrant, about 3 minutes. Add water, coconut milk and lentils. Simmer for 10 minutes, then add chopped tomatillos, cilantro and slivered chilies. Cook 10 minutes more, until lentils are tender. Puree with a stick blender and add lime zest and juice, adjusting salt as needed. Serve chilled, garnished with cilantro sprigs, sliced cucumber, serrano, lime and a drizzle of coconut milk.

Variations: Add poached prawns or crushed peanuts. Garnish with bean or lentil sprouts or slivered apple, especially a tart varietal like Granny Smith. Serve with cold bean thread noodles for a more substantial meal.

Yield: 1.5 quarts

This falls into the “who knew how much I would love this” category. The creaminess of the avocado balances the acid components beautifully. Try this on vegetables or pork, or on plain old green salad.

This is how I made it. Nothing’s set in stone.

1 small avocado

juice of 1/2 lemon

about 1/3 cup white wine vinegar or white balsamic vinegar

about 1/2 cup olive oil

garlic salt or salt

Mash avocado with a fork until smooth. Add lemon juice and some vinegar. Then add oil until the balance of acid to fat tastes right, then salt until the flavors pop. You’re very welcome.

This classic almost-from-scratch dish is a great side for a Mexican meal.

1/2 c chopped white onion

1 cup white rice

1- 7 oz. can of salsa of your choice

salt

oil

Preheat oven to 350F

Sweat onions in oil over medium heat in an ovenproof saucepan. Add rice and cook until it turns a milky white color. Dump in salsa and stir for a moment while it sears.  Fill salsa can with water and add that, plus a bit of salt. Bring to the boil, and scrape down any remaining grains of rice. Cover pan tightly and bake for about 25 minutes, tasting for doneness. Let stand 5 minutes before serving.

(adapted from Rick Bayless’s Classic Red Tomato Rice recipe)